Dealing With Criticism and Difference in Opinion
Robert Elias Najemy
Why this is important
We often become emotionally disturbed during a disagreement, or an argument, or when someone criticizes us or disagrees with us. In such cases our personality usually feels hurt, demeaned and in danger.
When we feel this way, we destroy our own happiness, clarity and health and often behave in ways which we later regret.
A simple technique for gaining clarity is to:
1. Remember that concerning criticism, there are two possibilities:
a. The other person might be correct in his or her observations and criticism. In this case we would benefit by admitting it and making the proper adjustment in our behavior. We have everything to gain by listening and evolving through othersĀ¹ comments. What prevents us is the belief that we are not lovable if we are not perfect. Thus, we do not want to see or admit our faults. When we realize that we are worthy of love and respect even when we are not perfect or right, then we will be able to look at our faults.
b. The other person might be wrong. In this case, it is his or her projection, and we need not be affected by these misconceptions or projections. We have in this case the lesson of loving ourselves and also the others even when they perceive us in distorted and negative ways.
2. One solution would be simply not to react one way or the other at first, but to reflect upon what has been said for some time so as to evaluate whether or not it is true.
We can establish a space in our minds where we can store such questions about our personality structure or actions so as to observe objectively for ourselves if they are true. If they are not, then we simply continue on in the way we were.
We need not feel hurt, angry, defend ourselves, prove ourselves, or attack. When we feel inner security and self-worth, we do not need to react in these ways.
3. We can simply thank the other for this feedback and tell him or her that we will think about this observation and will gradually come to our conclusions, and if necessary, make changes.
We do not need to live our lives in accordance with others perceptions. We can listen to all, but follow ourselves.
Note:
A "thank you" is enough.
Be Well!!
Peace to all,
Larry
Please visit our sponsors
Results 71 to 71 of 71
Thread: What A Mess This Has Turned Into
-
28-01-2006, 08:25 PM #71
- Join Date
- Aug 2005
- Posts
- 50
- Feedback Score
- 0
- Thanks
- 0
- Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Another way of thinking... with LOVE!
-
Sponsored Links
Thread Information
Users Browsing this Thread
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)
24 Hour Gold
Advertising
- Over 20.000 UNIQUE Daily!
- Get Maximum Exposure For Your Site!
- Get QUALITY Converting Traffic!
- Advertise Here Today!
Out Of Billions Of Website's Online.
Members Are Online From.
- Get Maximum Exposure For Your Site!
- Get QUALITY Converting Traffic!
- Advertise Here Today!
Out Of Billions Of Website's Online.
Members Are Online From.