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Bad Year For Blondes
BAD YEAR FOR BLONDES
January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels. Hellloooo!!!.....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!
March - Got really excited....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....box said "2-4 years!"
April - Trapped on escalator for hours....power went out!
May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets
June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope
July -Lost breast-stroke swimming competition.....learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!
August - Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....car swamped because soft-top was open
September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???
October - Hate M&M's.....they are so hard to peel.
November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days....instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!
December - Couldn't call 911.... ."duh"... .there's no "eleven" button on the stupid phone!
What a year!s
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Oi..yu yu youiii.... :rofl:
I almost had a blond looking cheese block trying to work its way down my throat while cracking up like a bronchitis patient reading halfway through August.... ouch, that hurts!!!:noserious
YB. - I'll go have my bourbon with blond beer added... http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/13/13_4_9.gif
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hi Yogi, I posted this joke especially for you and Neno. I know you two love blonde jokes and I thought the two of you might like a good laugh. I'm glad to hear you did enjoy it.
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A plane is on its way to Melbourne when a blonde in economy class gets up and moves to the First Class section and sits down.
The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket.
She then tells the blonde passenger that she paid for Economy and that she will have to go and sit in the back.
The blonde replies, 'I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Melbourne and I'm staying right here!'
The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the pilot and co-pilot that there is some blonde bimbo sitting in First Class that belongs in Economy and won't move back to her seat.
The co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for Economy she is only entitled to an Economy place and she will have to leave and return to her original seat.
The blonde replies, Im blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Melbourne and I'm staying right here!' Exasperated the co-pilot tells the pilot that it was no use and that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to Arrest this blonde woman that won't listen to reason.
The pilot says, 'You say she's blonde?' 'I'll handle this, I'm married to a blonde, and I speak blonde!'
He goes back to the blonde, whispers in her ear, and she says, "Oh I'm sorry - I had no idea," gets up and moves back to her Seat in the economy section.
The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and asked him what he said to make her move without any fuss. The pilot replied, "I told her First Class isn't going to Melbourne."