A young Louisiana lad goes off to LSU, but about 1/3 of the way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered away all of the money his parents gave him.

Then he gets an idea. He calls his daddy. "Dad," he says, "you won't believe the wonders that modern education are coming up
with! Why, they actually have a program here at LSU that will teach our dog Ole Blue how to talk!"

"That's absolutely amazing," his father says. "How do I get
him in that program?"

"Just send him down here with $1,000" the boy says. "I'll
get him into the course." So, his father sends the dog and the
$1,000. About 2/3 way through the semester, the money runs out. The boy calls his father again.

"So how's Ole Blue doing, son," his father asks.

"Awesome, Dad, he's talking up a storm," he says, "but you
just won't believe this - they've had such good results with this
program that they've implemented a new one to teach the animals how to READ!"

"READ," says his father, "No kidding! What do I have to do
to get him in that program?"

Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the class." His father sends the money.

The boy now has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out that the dog can neither talk, nor read. So he shoots the dog.

When he gets home at the end of the semester, his father is
all excited. "Where's Ole Blue? I just can't wait to see him
talk and read something!"

"Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday
morning, just before we left to drive home, Ole Blue was in the living room kicked back in the recliner, reading the Morning Advocate, like he usually does. Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messing' around with that little redhead who lives on Oak Street?'

The father says, "I hope you SHOT that son of a gun before
he talks to your Mother!"

"I sure did, Dad!"

"That's my boy!"