Hi! This will be a short answer because, from my personal experience, it's a simple thing for me to explain. I'm not a doctor so this will be a non medical answer. My husband died eight months ago of cancer and, though he was in no pain at all and never asked for painkillers, which he loved by the way, he knew he was about to die because he had absolutely no energy left whatsoever. His body was shutting down over a period of about three weeks and with every day that passed he became more and more still and uninterested in anything but breathing.

Obviously, this differs from person to person, but I think that when the body begins to change so much from what we've always known, we feel that difference and can feel that we are too weak to get better. One other thing, which is just my opinion. Usually, when someone is close to death, people begin to arrive to say their last good byes or, in my husband's case I began to stay at the hospital twenty four hours a day. The dying person sees all of this attention all of a sudden and the attention, together with how the person is feeling are a message to him or her that the time to leave us is arriving soon. This is a terribly sad experience and it's best to have someone present to give comfort to the loved ones who remain. I had no one and the anguish was and still is, unbearable. I hope I've been able to answer your question in my own small way. Bye!!

I am making this addition to my original answer :Since I wrote this, I've received sincere condolences and have read some of the most intense and heartbreaking stories of losing loved ones that I have ever read in my life!!!! I know that I'm having a hard time, but I'm ashamed to say that I just didn't realize (not because of stupidity or selfish reasons) how many of us are suffering or have suffered the loss of someone who meant the world to us.

As I read your kind responses and encouragement and the stories of all of you who are still suffering now, in this moment, as I am, I feel totally overwhelmed and, even if this sounds like a line from a story book or something, I have this intense desire to give every single one of you a giant hug!! I'm not a hugging type of person either, but I think that we *all * need one!!

You really, really can't imagine how emotionally close to all of you that I feel!! I need to say two more things here :As I said in the comment that I added, I am, for some reason, not notified by Quora of every response. Since I wrote the comment, though, I've learned how to check for them. I will respond to everyone. It may take time, so please, please forgive me and know that I am reading EVERYTHING!!! I am also “absorbing “everything I read. It's not just like a quick passover of the message and it's over with. No, in fact, I'm thinking about you all during the day rather than myself. So, please know that you have written some powerful accounts of what you have been through and I hope that many people are reading them, as I am, and are realizing what common experiences we have without even realizing it sometimes. The final thing is to explain why it will take me a little more time to respond.

I didn't want to sound too depressing when I originally wrote, so I didn't mention this. When Jack (my husband who's name was Giacomo in Italian) died, we went through a period of the last three weeks before his death that I wouldn't wish on the devil himself!! The very concise version is that he had been promised a hospital bed on a “first available “ emergency basis by doctors whom we had trusted for twelve years. Instead, he was left to die of hunger and thirst on our sofa (actually a tiny love seat with no arms so you can imagine that!!) for nine days before I finally, against his wishes, freaked out totally and called an ambulance. He wasn't physically able to ingest food or any liquid but water. In those nine days he ingested a total of 3/4 of a litre of water and nothing more. He was completely conscious.

I have decided, for my own sanity, to write a report to the hospital about the various and horrible, horrible failures on their part, in the death of the most wonderful person I've ever known. There were also people, though, who went above and beyond normal care and I'll write about them too!! My point is that on Monday I will be beginning to write the story of this (for us) tragedy. Since, I want this to be taken seriously by the hospital I'm having an Italian friend help me with writing it in perfect Italian. All of this is going to take up the entire next week of my time and my emotions.

I wanted to explain this only so that you would understand why it's taking me so long to get back to you. I will still be reading any and all replies here with the total and complete respect that I have had for every one of your responses from day one!!! I really appreciate everyone's patience and I just want to make sure that you know that I feel very honored that you have chosen to share your experiences with me (and I hope with many others) and somehow your sadness has opened my eyes to the fact that I may have been too self absorbed (in grief) to realize that I am far from the only person who has had a bad time (to put it very mildly!). I'll let you all go now and please know that I am thinking of all of you and am immensely thankful that you have written to me!!!!!!!

Source: https://www.quora.com/How-do-cancer-...he-end-is-near


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